Hush, Hush and on the QT: Part II

Are you ready to vote Marilyn, Angie, Rick and Ed off the island yet? Here’s more on Western Slope political hay for your entertainment.Political props: horses and tractors

With John Salazar being only one of four farmers out of more than 400 congressmen, how is it that most other politicians are seen on horses and farm equipment? As one Salazar congressional worker scoffed, “Scott Tipton (Salazar’s Republican opponent) filmed one of his commercials with a borrowed horse and then afterwards, jumped into his Porche and drove away.”

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Salazar admitted that if he doesn’t get one day on a tractor a week, he’s not very fun to work with in Washington DC. This year, he was a little delayed on the campaign trail. “I just had to bring in the last truck of potatoes for the season,” he said. “Plus, that was one of the few private times I got to have with my wife.”

Exclusive: A horse is a horse unless of course, he’s in a TV commercial

As any experienced political advertising consultant knows, you can’t use just any horse’s behind in a Bob Beauprez gubernatorial ad buy worth thousands and thousands of dollars. So Colorado Confidential took a look at what horse breed would pass the “ass test.”

Breed: Mixed/Pinto
Pro: Interesting coloration Con: Too distracting; viewers would be looking at horse, not Bob.

Breed: Arabian
Pro: White color = good guy; Con: Smaller stature and would need to proportionately reduce Western saddle size making Bob look too big to sit in it.

Breed: Appaloosa
Pro: Right height and color ok; Con: Tail too short. People would wonder if it had been chopped.

Breed: Thoroughbred
Pro: Athletic Con: Too tall. Rear projectiles would be exactly at face level. Horse’s head would be much higher than Bob’s in silhouette walk away shot. Plus, a Western saddle looks funny on a race horse.

Breed: Quarterhorse, the winner!
Pro: Best height. Bob can nod downward, camera can get rear and Bob with hay fork (aka “American Gothic”) in a tight shot, and horse hangs head in obedience when walking.

Photos by Leslie Robinson.